𓃦 12/22/24

It's almost Christmas for those who celebrate, so to those, happy holidays. While I haven’t been able to touch my blog or site for a hot moment, I decided to come around and give some fun info…

For one, I am now working on a new site, well slowly working on it but still being worked on. It’s meant to be more general and personal about my personal interests and other topics not related to my nonhumanity. The other thing is that I have picked up a new hobby that’s been taking a lot of my time, kandi making.

Later on one of these days I’ll show some I’ve made, however I’ve posted some to my Tumblr already. Feel free to check out whatever there… but I hope to create more coyote and nonhuman focused stuff here, I’d love to share that sort of thing here.

I do not have a lot to update here however I suppose. Just an update and information, however I hope to challenge myself to write more and to update my writings more. At the very least I’ll attempt that!

𓃦 12/1/24

Jee I kinda suck at keeping up with things, but then again I kinda suck at routine in general when it comes to things, esp in the sense of talking about life. That was sort of the whole reason I wanted to start a blog, well , more so a blog focused on my alterhumanity. It's an important thing to me so I hope to keep up. I don't have a lot to write though despite the gap in time. I do know though that since my last entry, it's gotten colder. This is a good thing for me! I live somewhat more north of the heart of the Midwest, meaning we get both the cold and the snow. Last night and today it's been snowing, the snow deeply affects me in my coyoteself or at least some part of my coyote sense. It makes me feel more animal. However going into detail with that may be too much for a blog entry. Consider it a future piece.

Regardless, I hope to write more here and work more on my site, esp now with the colder weather I should have more collected thoughts to write about. Thank you for stopping by travellers

𓃦 11/6/24

It's been another hot moment since I have updated this place. I'm sorry for that. Life has been well... loud? Busy? Unsure of the best way to put it. If you know your stuff about the USA n shit, aye, you know what recently happened. Uh. I'm visibly queer and I'm native, living in a red state under a bad man. So, the whole thing ofc is expected to be at least a little stressful for me. Which is lol. It's scary for folks like me out there at the moment but we keep breathing. The best I can do, the best we can do is live yeah? I don't like to be too negative when it comes to things like this but I understand how hard it is to keep your chins up and to get moving. I can’t lie and say things will be okay, they likely won’t be. I know for myself they won’t be… but I mean. Keep living. It’s hard. Never wanted to go on a tangent like this on my blog ever but it’s my blog and I feel like I need a small place with little to no eyes on me and just spill my guts.

I think in an odd and grim way, this is the clearest reminder of who I am as a being. An odd were, an odd coyote playing human in a place where I just happened to be unlucky. Last night, I kept thinking to myself over and over again, how much it would just be easier to wake up as a coyote, be a coyote, get out of my trapped skin, my prison of society and humanity and just be an animal fleeing and be an animal surviving… or at the very least get out of here. A grim reminder of my own humanity or I think the lack of it. I feel like I’m stuck, a coyote with zoochosis. I think that’s the best way to put it for myself is I feel like a coyote with zoochosis. Maybe I do. I think I do. Kinda sucks but we roll yeah?

Regardless of it, I want to keep my head up. I have been feeling more of myself in my coyote awareness, I have been spending a lot of recent weeks soul searching. Just as I updated this blog, I’ll be adding/have added a little tangent in my writings and I have been feeling really good about my identity as a coyote and more. Being able to explore myself more so and more openly with folks. I love my packs, my bands, my circles n whatnot btw. If y’all ever see this, I love you!

Keep your chins up my friends, creatures, beings, and all alike. We keep breathing, we keep living, our lives is a sign of rebellion and a sign of the fact that us as minorities, have been here, are here, will be here, always be here. Keep living ♡ , love y’all

𓃦 10/16/24

Last couple of days have been a bit of a handful. In the sense of life stuff, been wildly busy between working on the barn and social stuff with circles... which includes depressive episodes in a way. However, I have a weird case of reverse seasonal depression haha, I'm better off in the colder weather than the warmer, whatever that means. Regardless, it's been a little hectic and I haven't been able to update this blog as much as I've been wanting to.

I had another neat moment regarding my nonhumanity. I've only heard the term a couple of times but I think it would fit in a way. I experienced something I think ? would be called a shadow shift. I guess to say it means I saw my coyote self in the shadows casted by the dim light of the moon. It's not a supernatural or physical shifting thing. Just something I noticed when I was walking last night. I could vaguely see my ears and vaguely see my tail behind me. It’s a little on the shocking side since I rarely ever hear about these kinds of shifts. I’ve only heard about them maybe once or twice in the community and I’ve been around since I was far too young. Though, I’m not complaining, I just find it unique and neat … regardless. It’s the full moon tonight and I’m already pumped. I plan to get fully decked out in coyote gear and just bask in it ♥

𓃦 10/8/24

Another okay morning, it's about 6am, attempting to fix my sleep schedule, meaning I happen to be staying up and busy all night and day, and sleep at a reasonable time at night! So far, struggling but we’ll make it. Regardless. Sticking on topic I guess, the temperatures have been dropping pretty greatly. I live in southwest Iowa, not a great place but it’s quiet and I live pretty much in the middle of nowhere. These times are a little odd for myself, not in a bad way but in a more of… need to get used to the changes sort of way.

I am a coyote at all times, a suntherian if you will, but when it comes to times like autumn and winter, I believe this is when I feel the strongest as myself. It’s strange but welcoming. I often can't help but imagine and wait for the days when the nights and mornings are cold enough to see my breath, and they’re finally here. It’s welcoming.

It’s sort of a strange thing, not entirely recent but somewhat recent. I would often imagine myself breathing like a coyote, were or feral. My wereself’s muzzle slightly ajar and I exhale deeply, vapor clouding the view in front of my muzzle’s view. I easily could feel how the air around me creep through my fur, ears twitching just lightly in response to the cold air biting at my more exposed skin. I feel content with the chill air, I feel that my coat has gotten thicker as a response and it’s comfortable.

It was a strong sense of me and my wereself tonight, I was truly able to feel myself and who I am. A wonderful feeling...

Alongside that, I think tonight was another bonus, these gorgeous lights would strike the skies and say hello!!

𓃦 10/6/24

This is now the first entry on this blog, hooray! This is something I've been trying to figure out for a little while now, however, I am a little slow to html or coding in general. However! Clearly this exists now so that means I came out on top and I got this going finally. At the time of writing this, it's about 9:30AM, meaning I haven't slept, pulling an all-nighter as any 20yo should be doing haha. However, I am feeling great and full of energy, finally finally getting this site where I want it to go. I am full of pride of this site, it's not great or even good, but it's mine and I feel prideful of that.

I guess, where do I go from here? Being honest, no idea. I plan to really use this blog to talk about smaller and less essay-like things regarding my day-to-day nonhumanity and my queerness, maybe my race and being of how it works with my identities, otherwise I'm still figuring things out. Regardless, I'll figure it out on the road! Hell yeah.